When Life Takes Over…

17 Mar

Well greetings readers…are there any of you out there?! {Fingers crossed for a YES!}

I know I’ve been MIA of late…well that is actually the understatement of the year, but I’m back and working toward consistency! To say that the last month has been chaotic is yet ANOTHER understatement (let me catch my breath while I’m sitting here…)! With travels to Austin, Seattle, and Las Vegas, 3 races, the addition of 9 new classes to teach, the culmination of USD Basketball season and the WCC Tournament play, Benjamin (Youngest Nephew) turning 1 year old…and just life in general, my life has felt like its been turned upside down for most of the last 4 weeks.

This week has been just as chaotic with Parent Observation week in the majority of my dance classes…BUT it was also one of fulfillment, appreciation, and epiphanies (yes that is plural).

So where to start? Let’s start with how BLESSED I feel right now. I always say I am one of the lucky ones. To live my dream day in and day out. Yes there are struggles (both physically, mentally and financially), but at the end of the day I get to see THESE beautiful faces every day.

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Whether they are my young dancers, my beautiful USD team, or Burlesque girls at Culture Shock Dance Center, I get to spend my days teaching dance. Spreading my love and passion for it to others. There are no words to describe how rewarding that is. No amount of money could take its place. Period. End of Story.

This week I was reminded even more of that as I received some very kind and wonderful words from my kids’ parents during Parent Observation week. I love when my kids tell me and SHOW me how much fun they have in classes, but its phenomenal to hear parents tell you as well. To let you know that their kids go home and practice what you teach them. To tell you how they talk about you at home. I am blessed. 100% Blessed.

Another reason I’ve been MIA of late is because I’ve felt less than at my best, physically and mentally. I haven’t been working out (at all) and my eating habits of late have sucked (lets just be honest). And for me I felt like if I wasn’t being at the top of my game in my own life, how can I come here and write about it. But then I remembered it is part of my journey. Even the ruts should be shared. Because we all fall into them. It happens. The sooner we learn to accept that, the more successful we (including me) will be.

What was at the root of the rut? I kept finding myself restarting every couple days with my meals. I’d do really well and then BAM, I’d have a bad day and decide to indulge, or go out of town and say ‘what the heck?’, a birthday celebration would come up, friends would come in town…All the reasons I KNOW I shouldn’t give into. But I just kept feeling like I was failing. So I let myself fail. Stupid. Completely. Utterly. Stupid. The workout regiment went down the hole too. With adding 9 new classes and then the Austin Full Marathon my energy levels dropped, and I knew I couldn’t afford getting sick like after the last marathon. It put me out of teaching for nearly a week and a half. Yeah….financially I can’t afford that right now. THIS girl is slightly on the broke side thee days. So I played it safe and stayed away from pushing it too hard.

This week though I finally decided to get back into it. I felt like I was getting back to me and that needed to include me getting my butt in the gym. Don’t get me wrong, my days were still exhausting, but I can’t keep making excuses. I can’t keep saying TOMORROW. I said TOMORROW, YESTERDAY. So, today I finally decided it is time to get back at it. I went to the gym to try a training session with one of my very best friends and HER trainer. Leg day…OH. MY. GOD. I. LOVED. IT. Felt so good to actually PUSH myself. Do strength training. Because while I haven’t packed on any weight, I can FEEL my body is different. Body composition is everything people.

In the last few months all I’ve done is running and cardio work really. A few weight lifting sessions here or there, but with prepping for a marathon I knew I needed the running in and then I teach. So energy levels for weight lifting were not so great. Which caused me to get a little softer than I like. So I hit the gym. Hard. Barbell squats, more squats, lunges, and then 10 minutes of stair running. OOF. My legs were jello, but I’d MISSED how having my legs feel like they’d done WORK felt.

After much mulling this over the last couple of day, talking with my moms, my friends Katie and Amy, I realized something….I can’t do everything! Go figure…ha. I like to PRETEND I can. When I set goals I go 110% balls to the walls or I flake and do 0%. It is my standard operating procedure. Good that I know this, so hopefully I can now work to find some kind of balance. I have to figure out the things that are MOST important to me and do them. No excuses. Because I kept saying “once things settle down” or “this week was crazy. next week” and then I realized I’d been saying that for the last two months. Guess what? My life is crazy. It always has been. Always will be. And if I wait for it to slow down I’ll be waiting forever. Eff. That.

While I LOVE my marathon training and the way it pushes me to pack on the miles, I don’t love how it has drained me of energy for other things (Specifically weight lifting) in my life. So while I will continue to run and do the shorter half marathon distances (I love that I think 13.1 is short) I’m going to limit the number of fulls I do in a year. Because I want to be fit, fast and strong. And that means being able to weight lift. I’m not super human and my energy levels currently don’t allow for me to train for a marathon, teach full time, strength train and live a life outside of work and working out. One day I hope to be able to do that, but its something to work up to.

For now….I’m going to get back to my strength training. Get back to training for speed in my runs (shorter distances at a faster pace). Get back to a happier me. Strong. Fit. Fast.

What fitness goals have you been putting off till tomorrow? 

2 Responses to “When Life Takes Over…”

  1. Shannon Hickman March 19, 2013 at 7:47 PM #

    YAY! Amy, I’m so happy you’ve been on this path of discovery and found the right direction for you. It’s so great to be able to ‘catch up’ with you on the blog and see how you are doing – miss you lots and really happy for all you are doing and for following your dreams and appreciating life for everything it is. Life is struggle – I’m pretty sure Buddha said that, and it’s a wondrous thing to accept the struggle as what it is, and not try to remove it from life, but to accept and include it. Very Zen of you girl! 😉 I can’t wait until we can visit you in SD!

    • Amy March 27, 2013 at 8:59 PM #

      Thanks Shannon! I miss you soooo much! I am so jealous of all your beautiful surroundings!
      When are you in SD Next?!?! We need a visit and ASAP!

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